30 August 2015

Immigration

Clearly I support Immigration, if I didn’t then my future plans are hypocritical.

What is immigration?

Put simply, it is a person not born here but living here. It covers both those here temporarily and those intending to settle.

Break it down further and it also covers people like the Governor of the Bank of England (no less) or the man who just hitched a ride in a truck through the tunnel from France. Both those are migrants.

Are both legal though?

That rather depends because it isn’t strictly speaking an easy answer.

Bank Manager is not on the list of those people we seek from abroad to work in this country so, how comes the Governor got his job? I guess it’s because he knew someone who knew someone. I can’t believe we are lacking suitable UK talent we need a Canadian to run the bank which represents this country.

This, however, highlights the problem.

We are not as a nation against immigration, what we are against is a certain type of immigrant. If they are wealthy, in jobs we cannot hope to have and speak English then we seem to be OK with it.

If they are poor, in need. If English isn’t their first language and, particularly, if they are black, we seem to have real issue with that sort of immigrant. Perhaps because we don’t see an immediate benefit to ourselves of that.

You see, we have zero problem with someone from India who opens a restaurant, no issue at all with anyone from Asia if they open up a restaurant because we sort of like Indian or Chinese food so, they’re OK but, the random black guy … hmm, what benefit?

In reality, probably not a lot at first, give it time.

We have this instant acceptance for those who are familiar. Americans, Australians, those from New Zealand & Canada, anyone who looks like the people down the Chinese restaurant, we are cool with all of those and why? Well, most if not all of those just integrate by default. They all speak English after a fashion and none of them have radical ideas which might in some way change the familiar country we’re used to.

Now, we are left with two categories we have the biggest issue with.

Eastern Europeans & those from India and Pakistan, or the Middle East.

Eastern Europeans because, well, too often they don’t integrate at all. They have no intention of settling here, they are just here to work and send money home. They will do jobs we wouldn’t want to do for the money we wouldn’t want to accept. In short, the UK Pound is worth so much in their country that even minimum wage is an attractive proposition to them. So, whilst they do pay taxes here and provide services, they are too visible. Our towns and cities are becoming seemingly over run with people who don’t speak English in the street and who open shops selling the stuff they are used to back home making some parts of the UK feel like ‘Little Poland’. Of course, we’d never do such a thing .. you know, like in the Spanish Coastal Resorts or Ibiza where every other bar is a British Pub and a huge amount of restaurants are owned by the British, likewise shops catering for our needs. So, that’s the way Europe works but our society is full of NIMBY’s (not in my back yard)

The other category, the Indians, Syrians, Muslims generally, from Pakistan and so on … we don’t like the heavy influence of their religions. We don’t like the skyline broken up by a Mosque, it’s not British. We don’t want Muslim Schools … Catholic schools are fine and Catholicism is not British either by the way, as Henry VIII.

So, what is the answer?

Look, we keep blaming them, it’s not them it’s us who are the problem. We have an inconsistent and prejudice view of immigration.

On the one hand we’re dead against it because they are not like us and yet, on the other, if they suit our needs we love them.

What would really solve the issue is if this country learnt a little from some of the countries immigrants come from. In many there would be zero tolerance of any religious symbolism which wasn’t their own. They will take offence at those who refuse to wear ‘suitable’ clothing. They will make laws we would class as prejudicial and why do they do this? To preserve the personality of their culture.

In contrast, over here, we’ve had an anything goes policy. People are free to practise their own religion, set up their own faith schools, never to integrate into British society. There is the problem right there. By allowing so much freedom we’ve given away a significant part of our identity. We are so afraid of being called racist we’ve allowed them to ignore the race of the country they now live in and to imprint their own identity over ours. That is wrong on so many levels. We’ve allowed freedom to deny freedom to those others who do not share the beliefs of certain immigrant groups. Even 2nd and 3rd generation are perpetuating this voluntary apartheid between their culture and ours.

Look, the people in Calais, that’s a smokescreen, the same with the refugees on the boats, they are not the same problem and should never be connected with the problem we have.

With those we need to end the hostilities in their country of origin, stop talking about it and do something. We need to close down the criminal gangs we know are operating, keep those people safe as close to their homes as possible. As humans we should not tolerate the treatment these people are getting. Many are legitimate migrants. We didn’t earn the right to be British, we didn’t chose to exit the groin of a British citizen, we are here by no more right than the randomness of birth. Sure, that matters but, the saying, ‘there but for the grace of God go I’ should mean something. We’ve not earned the right merely by birth to say we are better than them, we need to show some compassion.

There is nothing a government likes to do more than find scapegoats to distract us from the issues they are not dealing with. In this country we’re experts at the blame game. I believe it was Kennedy who said “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country”.

We need to stop relying on our politicians to tell the truth and do the right thing, we certainly need to stop believing everything we read in the press.

Time to think about think about this properly.

28 August 2015

That day went quick!

Trying to remember what I did today, not so easy as I am sure I was doing several things at the same time … apologies to Daisy, I think I didn’t quite complete the dishwasher bit.

I forced myself to stay in bed a little later. Sure, I woke up just before 7am and each half hour but I didn’t get up until after 9am.

I took Daisy to Sainsbury as she needed to get something for a birthday present.

Around 11 something I came back and Anne popped in for a chat, always nice to see her and the kids though Zach tried flying off some steps but he’s OK.

Zoey has still not been eating or drinking, it’s been many weeks now since she started not being right.

I called 111 which is our emergency Health Service number and spent an age on the phone to them, probably an hour or so. Got through to the GP surgery and eventually got them to send out a doctor who examined Zoey thoroughly and concluded she was physically OK but emotionally a mess. She’s been prescribed some anti depressants.

In there somewhere I managed to spend some time with my Dennis who is unwell at the moment, he has a fever so I was mean and made him go take a cold shower.

Quite possibly there is more stuff I did in there somewhere but, I can’t be doing with trying to work out what.

Hopefully Saturday is a little less busy.

I read somewhere the clocks change this weekend. It was only later, after I spoke to Dennis and told him, it dawned on me this was way too early so … it’s October 25 they go back, not any time soon!

26 August 2015

It's a Small World After All

In life we are said to meet one soul mate, that special person we can totally relate to, who loves us no matter what and we love them the same.

There was a time, not so long ago when we only had the people within a few streets of us to find them from. Then there were trains and telephones and we might find them in the next town. Cars came along to make life easier, TV showed us a bigger view and they might now be anywhere in the country. Then we got air travel and the internet, we’ve a whole world to choose from.

Our streets is now a planet so, why are you alone precisely?

My soul mate is 6,668 miles away flying in a dead straight line, that’s like, wow!

Life Experiences

Steve_1_thumb.jpgI shared this philosophy of mine the other day with a friend and firmly believe if we all thought this way we could live happier, more fulfilled lives.

All of us throughout life have ups and downs. Some of those are so huge we have real trouble with them. These life experiences are relative to the general level of experiences we have had. What might be devastating for one person is a minor blimp in the life of someone else but, to both, the impact of ‘their’ big one is life long.

Thinking of some examples:

 

  • A harsh childhood with bullying and depression
  • A relationship which went wrong
  • A lost job
  • An illness
  • The death of someone special
  • A bad accident
  • Money worries
  • Unexpected parenthood
  • Being thrust into a Caring role
  • Rejection

These and many more are life changers for many. Some might experience just one or two of these, others might experience them all. As it happens, I got the full list and then some and several of them many times over.

All or any of these can be devastating at the time but, what we do with them when they become memories defines us.

Do we wallow in self pity or hide away in an attempt to protect ourselves? Do we allow paranoia to settle in and consume us? Do we never take any chances ‘just in case’?

Well, no, I don’t think we should stop living to the full because of any of those. What we can do is accept that those experiences have defined us, made us who we are now but, who we want to be, that’s a choice. I would rather take a similar risk over and over because the theory was still correct than never take that chance again.

Of course, we’d be fools if we didn’t learn from the past but, only blame yourself for the things you actually had control over. If someone cheats on you then ‘they’ cheated on you, no one else. You cannot change them, that’s their personality to live with. If you allowed it to go on too long well, that you can change, next time, wake up and smell the coffee!

We cannot change the death of a loved one, we can only grow from it. Don’t dwell on what you’ve lost but celebrate what you learnt from them and use it. If you learnt to love then you know you can love, don’t run away from that, embrace it.

As people we’ve no choice but to keep moving forward, right until our last breath we can and should make choices. If we were sad when someone died then, make the last times with those special to you about the future, not the past. But, before we get to our death bed remember, we get one shot at this, make it count!

We are the sum of our experiences so, stop making excuses, go get some experiences. The more we do in life, the more we explore our abilities and desires the more we are better able to deal with the things life might throw at us. If we have negative experiences then, make sure your mind has some positive experiences to compensate.

Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water. No one can ever honestly say the entirety of a relationship was bad when it all goes wrong. There will have been good times so, don’t try to paint those black. Glory in those good times, they were real at the time, you felt it, you were happy, hold on to them.

In short, embrace your entire life, good or bad. Don’t be afraid to enjoy life to the full when it’s good and don’t let your life come to a stop when the shit hit the fan.

You cannot smile every day of your life, no one can do that and mean it. You can though smile about your life in the past and about the mystery of what isn’t yet written.

Life is one great adventure, don’t miss the boat!

21 August 2015

Just when I start to chill out …

Some arse starts smoking weed just outside my house, I detest stoners!

Anyway, as I was going to say … the past few weeks have been stupidly stressful. Our Zoey, bless her, has become very difficult to manage. We’ve been able to work out it is a behaviour thing, not an illness or anything which can be easily treated. She has become increasingly and dangerously stubborn.

Now, I don’t much mind if she wants to laze around all day, she’s never going to have a job, she’s got no real responsibilities and so on which means, she’s a little like someone that retired. That’s not the issue, she’s got it in her head now that eating and personal hygiene are optional and, more often than not, she does neither. She is borderline underweight now, just a couple of pounds in it.

 

Today we had a huge kick off because I tried to force the issue on her getting clean. I got kicked and slapped and she tried to bite me at one point. She’d gone three days without anything close to a wash and was smelling awful, I’d go as far to say disgusting. Eventually Daisy was able to take over and force the issue better than me and get her clean. Doing so she discovered Zoey had obviously come on some time ago and hadn’t used any sanitary products.

Someone is having to sit with her for up to two hours to ensure she eats at all.

For weeks she’s been ignorant and rude to everyone, no one is spared. She’s happy enough to talk about trivia that doesn’t matter but, try and get her to do something essential to her well being and she plays dumb and she is playing at it.

She wasn’t any better when she stayed with her mum and certainly no better when she stayed with Matt & Anne.

Right now it’s almost midnight. It’s a hot night so doors are being left open and Zoey is throwing a tantrum because she’s been asked not to watch any more movies in her room tonight.

I had to take a break from writing this as things escalated.

Zoey started to get very violent and attacked Daisy so I had to restrain her, it wasn’t at all pleasant.

Am at a loss to know what to do. It was obvious Zoey was going out of her way to wake the boys, she failed thankfully. Seeing how unpredictable she is at the moment the boys have been taken into Sean & Daisy’s room with them for this night for their safety.

It’s like Jermaine all over again and even all these years later, I don’t believe we’ve recovered to the point we can handle all that again.

15 August 2015

Phew

So tired!

Tomorrow might be the first time in weeks I don’t get to speak to Dennis 🙁

I am off first on a bike ride and then over at Abington Park for the concert at the bandstand. Dennis is scaring the life out of me riding the back of a bike who knows how many miles to a baptism and there’s likely no service there (phone) to let me know he got there OK so I’ll just like worry all day! On the plus side, he should be home before I go to bed and, if he remembers, can let me know then he got home OK.

Dressed up in my suit on Friday for a wedding … I remember looking good in that thing yet now I look like a fatty wearing my suit!

2015-08-14 12.11.06

I got a nutribullet now and I ain’t afraid to use it!

Loved the wedding car …

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Am off to bed now, cheers everyone

2015-08-14 18.18.52

09 August 2015

Retiring Abroad

I’ve got a few years before I retire, at least 13 anyway (is that all?) and it seems obvious to me that retiring abroad makes more sense than remaining in the UK.

Our minimum state pension changes next year and is promised to be at least £150 a week, possibly more, who knows yet, we shall find out next season. That £650 or so a month, not a great deal in this wonderful country of ours.But, that’s the UK. If we retire to the Philippines that money suddenly look attractive. With monthly wages there something not to far removed from £276 a month suddenly £650 looks very healthy indeed. On top of that, the Philippines just happens to be an indexed country which means that the rate of pension rises with inflation rather than being frozen as it is in so many other countries.

Frustratingly, me and Dennis will have hopefully, and maybe (he’s not asked yet) enjoyed many years of marriage to discover we have no legal status over there, that’s quite a big deal to me.

We’ll know and I guess that is the main thing of course. Who knows, by then a miracle might happen and they recognise same sex relationships but, I can’t see that happening.

I guess it’s just something to consider anyway.

05 August 2015

Busy Day

Had a lay in bed today until 10:20, true, it was about 2:20am when I went to bed but that’s still a step forward for me!

Managed to help Matt & Anne a fair bit today which was rewarding, nice to be able to be there for them for a change.

Put the rubbish out here and picked up some 8 & 6 legged friends in the process so needed a shower to flush them away (shudder)

Only managed an hour with Dennis earlier, I think the local internet cafe cut the connections around them to get some extra business. Thought there was an irony in an internet cafe which didn’t serve coffee!

Screenshot 2015-08-05 13.51.50

It’s not the best picture of Dennis, but it was a quick screen grab for my blog.

In the process of resetting my phone at the moment. It’s not been quite right since it went all lollipop on me and Samsung suggest a reset to resolve the issues. Worth  try I guess.

03 August 2015

Tired but …

I keep pushing myself anyway. That said, I am going to write this then go pass out for some hours or so!

Yesterday I was so tired I had to stop driving up to Derbyshire. I was able to eat something and carry on but, even so, stupid tired.

Had an epic GTAV session last night but I was so tired there were times I couldn’t remember which controls did what! I wasn’t doing much more than making up the numbers!

Today I was so tired I was driving up curbs in the car.

Am so tired I am genuinely having trouble thinking.

Even so, have been having a great many long conversations with Mama in the Philippines, that’s been fun and makes my relationship with Dennis feel even more real.

Went cycling yesterday but we only did 5 miles, not really good enough but still enjoyable.

Got some good news today that someone has finally got a long overdue criminal record and, about time! It’s not for the sort of crime that they should have been charged with and they will find some way to get someone else to pay the fine for them but, even so, they cannot deny that criminal element to their life now, perhaps the police won’t be quite so keen next time to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Back to being tired … should have gone straight to bed, am obligated now to doing something else so I won’t have time for a nap after all

FND Awareness month (but, always be aware)

This from my daughter - Daisy April is FND Awareness month & Autism Acceptance month. As someone who lives with both I wanted to raise...