2 Weeks in

Amazing as it seems I am two weeks through my visit here.

Some might be getting a little confused about why I am here. There is only one important reason and that is to be with Dennis. This isn’t a vacation to me, it’s just about having to travel to the Philippines because it is where Dennis happens to be. I’m still in very regular contact with home dealing with daily issues, the council, social services and so on. I am geographically away from it but technically still connected.

Obviously it’s cool to wander into Manila and see the place, travel in a Jeepney and so on. Wandering around the malls is fun but it is who I am with rather than where I am that matters most to me.

Highlights for me, apart from every second I spend with Dennis have to be meeting family and friends.

 

 

 

 

Veronica and her family and Imee of course who has kept me entertained for hours with conversation about anything and everything

 

 

Ireneo too tries real hard with his English and makes me feel welcome. Of course, my grasp of the local language is the reason I don’t communicate as much as I would like. I am hoping, now that I have heard it a lot more that I can contextualise better at home and learn a bit more.

 

 

‘Along’ or ‘Rusty’ or ‘Charles’ I really hope gets far in life. It’s quite difficult for me to accept that a younger person can be so willing to help older (not old) people. He just does what he is asked to do and often does most of it way before he is asked to do it. So many in the UK could learn a lot from people like Charles. I guess it is maybe a Filipino thing, something perhaps which used to happen in the UK but has been long since forgotten.

 

This is Grace and her family. I keep forgetting to get a picture of Teresita (is that the right spelling) though we’ve already met Twice. Veronica, Grace and Teresita are all Dennis’s sisters. Imee is a cousin and Charles a nephew.

All the family make me feel so welcome and make a huge effort to communicate apologising for their poor English. There is totally no need of course, it’s me who should speak the local dialect or, at least, their dialect. I am hugely grateful for all their efforts to involve me.

As well as family there are friends. Joy, sadly, needed to leave not long after I arrived. Last weekend I got to spend time with the lovely Richie and Andrew (Nanu) both here and at the Mall of Asia in Manila. Got to watch a really cool fireworks display too. Charles had never seen fireworks like that and I felt quite humbled to think how often I had and how much we take such things for granted. It really makes me feel like I want to personally raise this country to the level it should be but, I of course, can’t do that.

Sure, a few times the issue of the allegedly rich foreigner has raised its ugly head whereby some have presumed it’s OK for me to pay a small fortune but it’s totally not caused an issue and I think allowed a learning curve.

Coming was the right thing to do, thank you Steve C

and this is why …. me and Dennis together at last. Roll on next spring when hopefully he is in the UK with me for a visit and then full steam ahead to 2017

Ignoring those who would do us wrong

I wasn’t going to be particularly open about being in the Philippines at the moment. Bitter experience has shown me that there those who would wish to attack my happiness and I was trying to avoid that this time. As it happens social services are still doing a safeguarding investigation, that’s their way of saying they believe I did something to harm Zoey earlier in the year, they’re determined to find something. They won’t because there is nothing but they want to believe there is and there is nothing I can do about it. It’s not like a legal investigation, they don’t need to gather in all the evidence just that which they want that makes their accusation seem credible. From this they can reach any conclusion they want and make decisions upon it. I’d have to make a legal challenge at my own cost to disprove it. So, some evil, bitter person doing their worst, which is normally to contact the DWP, well, it’s not significant to me by comparison.

I am seeing the bigger longer term picture, me & Dennis. We’ve got a long way to go yet, a very long way. It’s going to be quite stressful and possibly expensive but we want ‘us’ and we’re going to fight for it. We were not brought together across the planet to give up if we get some knock backs.

For me, the greatest challenge is to learn enough of the language so as not to make my hosts feel awkward talking around me.

I couldn’t ask for a better, more loving partner then Dennis, he is beautiful inside out, I am very proud of him in so many ways. He is a teacher, what could be a more responsible profession? Educating the future of a nation. He sings beautifully … hey look, it’s a long list but shorter version is, I love him. What could be better than someone who holds us whilst we sleep? I hope I can be the man he needs me to be

Integration & Immigration

There must be some countries which get it right but I know the UK doesn’t and has not done so my entire life.

What people seem to object to most if the identity of their country being destroyed. We have towns in the UK now which are almost totally dominated by alien cultures. It doesn’t matter where they are from, that’s not the point. Where we went wrong was that we’ve just never insisted that those who moved to the country had to do anything to embrace it. They were encouraged to move in and being their culture with them. We made a few suggestions that it might be useful to integrate but we never insisted. Many even third generation immigrants speak with accent of their great grandparents home, not this country. They were allowed to place demands for equality when it came to all things religion especially. The more moved in and refused to speak English, the more English speakers moved out. Easily created entire areas of the country many born here won’t recognize as England. My own birth town now has changed beyond recognition almost. In the small parade of shops so many now are not traditional British. It leaves a feeling that ‘they’ have taken over. My existing home town has seen a huge influx of Eastern Europeans. It’s possible to visit the town centre and not hear English now. That’s not right, it’s not pleasant when we go to the Spanish Costa’s and hear mainly English, we should feel we’re in Spain.

It must be impossible for indigenous culture to remain and dominate regardless of immigration. I don’t really know how but I know a start would be for us to stop being terrified of having the conversation in case we get labeled racist.

A really good day

Breakfast with the family, well, first breakfast anyway, we’re sort of like Hobbits I think, we have second breakfast as well (no hairy feet)

Went to SM this morning and bought some new pillows, I have been borrowing so far so thought I should get some new ones. We had lunch in Mang  Inasal which was manic. Too much rushing about by staff and no enough doing.The food was good though and the desert was purple so it had to be good. Healthy might be pushing it a little!

After that we got the Jeepney back to the local Mall where Imee and I had a full body massage for a staggering £5 (ph350) for 1:20 of damn good stuff.

Back at the apartment again waiting for Dennis who’s still at work at the moment. In the background is the local Karaoke shop and, let’s just say it’s interesting.

Yesterday was a family day  which I wasn’t expecting but great fun anyway. We were joined by Dennis’s Sister Veronica and her family. I shared some brandy and beer but did have to give up briefly as the jetlag still had hold of me, I missed Dinner but Dennis went out later and got me a burger & fries.

They are all looking after me here, I even having them picking the bones out my fish because I am fussy and bones just put me off eating.I have managed to do some things though!

I’m really enjoying showering in cold water, 30°C will make cold water seem really attractive.

I am a little dehydrated so need to drink more, that temp zaps the fluids out for sure!

A different few days

It’s great to have Zoey back home. Now the issues with social services escalate as they fight to save money and we fight to make sure she gets what she needs.

I heavily photoshopped this picture and it’s easy to think we were actually together in the same place. Obviously that can’t be possible because I am sitting here and my PC says it’s 2:11 in the morning. Isn’t it a nice thought though that we could actually be together.

The flight would be horrible though, cheapest I’ve seen is via China and who the hell wants to go to China? Even then it is a 10 hour first flight which I will no doubt not sleep on and then a 5 hour wait for another 5 hours on a plane where I might actually sleep for a couple of hours … if I were to do that sort of thing.

I’ve even heard that China are obsessed with batteries, even if you follow all the instructions if they deem they are not for everyday use, such as in a camcorder, they will remove them and dump them, how terrible is that?

The horrible things unfolding in Paris, it’s appalling what terrorists do in their warped version of religion. They are just sick B********!

Good news Russia got suspended, won’t last but finally someone is telling them they are not above fairness and the law.

I think someone must have turned the heating up as it’s really hot here, no point trying to sleep now.

 

Zoey November 2

As some might know by now, this will be the last update on Zoey.

I got a call earlier on today telling me that the all those involved in her care have held emergency meetings and agreed that Zoey no longer meets the criteria for any form of detention and she is free to come home which she shall be doing tomorrow.

A huge thank you to all of those involved over the past several weeks, all your love, prayers and support, I cannot tell you enough how much it all means to me.

Equality

Wouldn’t it be lovely if the world had equality?

We read and talk about equality but, what is it?

The problem with the notion of it is that someone has to be more equal than someone else else we have a very weird idea of law and order. If the thief believes he is equal to his victim so can take their stuff, that doesn’t work! If we all had an equal right then, along with that comes the absolute need to know the difference between right and wrong but, that doesn’t work either. Some believe that being a homosexual is wrong so, ‘they’ deem the homosexual less equal.

Then we have those who believe equality requires compensation for the years of inequality such as those women who want to be equal but demand preferential treatment simply because they are women.

Further we have groups who believe they are more equal because they choose to interpret some ancient religious scripts in a way which tells them they are.

So, we can’t ever have true equality unless we follow one simple rule and just about most religions have it and there are no laws which disallow it … try this at home, at work and in the street.

Treat everyone in a way you should expect to treat your brothers and sisters. Love them and respect them unless they personally give you a reason not to. All of us should by birthright be assumed to be equal with everyone else, only we can choose to pull ourselves out of equality or treat someone unequal by some form of prejudice we’ve been taught.

Unless someone damages you or those you love directly, don’t judge them, thankfully that is the job of our elected politicians.

Zoey November 1

I visited earlier and she is really a joy to visit now. I also found a reliable way to get her to communicate as to whether she wants to come home or not and she made it abundantly clear just how much!

Now it is up to me to do my best to make sure it happens if I can. I told her, I can’t promise her anything other than I will do my best. There were a lot of tears and hugs but a lot of laughter too.

She made it clear she totally doesn’t like being watched 24/7, she says she feels intimidated … she didn’t say that word but I can’t remember what she actually said but that was what she was saying anyway.

It’s so sad to walk away with her standing there with her little wave trying to stay happy but near to tears.